Author: kirsten (Page 1 of 10)

For the last 15 years I have told a story that I believed was true.  In fact, it’s in my book, published for all the world to see.

As the story goes, I finished JFK50 in under what I believed was the cutoff time of 12 hours. And I did in fact get tossed by the director for not making the cut off and everyone that was behind me walked away, as they were directed to, toward the bus…And I kept going.  

Here’s the part that’s messing with me:
I’ve always remembered this happening around mile 40 — late in the day, in the dark, when you’re running on pure stubbornness.

But the cutoff point was actually closer to mile 30.
Which means it wasn’t night. It was around 2pm.

This was mistake #1…

And honestly? That makes it crazier.
Because it means I didn’t keep going for “another 10 miles.”
I kept going for over 20.
And I had to run them fast enough to erase the deficit.

At the finish line, it was dark.
I crossed with 17 minutes to spare — and I remember looking back and seeing a few headlamps behind me.

I later found out it wasn’t “a few.”
It was 89 people.

This means for the entirety of the race, I was holding an average pace of about 14 minutes per mile — which does not suck if you compare it to the NorthFace cut off for example, of 17-minute pace.

Today, as I was verifying and updating times on the new dashboard that I created to organize my race and training data, I started double-checking on race websites for a lot of my finishes over the last 15 years.

Here’s mistake #2 (the big one) – Turns out the cutoff was never twelve hours, it was 13 hours. Where did 12 come from in my head? Was that just something I was shooting for? Did I just turn my own memory into mythology?

The JFK initially followed the Army cut off for 50 miles, which is 20 hours, and that became too long to manage all the road closures, so they reduced it to 13.

Here’s what’s wild:
The truth doesn’t actually make the story less impressive.

If anything, it makes it more human.

But it also reminds me how easily we build identities around the version of a story we needed at the time — not the version that was technically perfect.

There is no version of this story where I didn’t keep going.

Whether the cutoff was 12 hours or 13… I still got pulled.
I still kept running.
And I still finished.

And I think that’s the part I’m taking with me into this season:
Not perfection.
Not mythology.

Just forward.

I may have gotten some details wrong – and let’s face it [and I think this made the final book cut] I was actually hallucinating at one point of that race, so its ok if my memory junked it up a little.

So now I’m asking myself a weird question:
Do I go back and fix it in my book?

And if I’m already rewriting… do I finally write the Version 2 I wanted all along — the one I rushed past when I cut over 100 pages out to turn a biography into a field guide?

Or do I just press forward with less than three weeks between me and my first ultra of the year – which will serve as the trainer for my second 100k two months later?

And I think it’s fair to say this:
If my training stays structured, smart, and injury-free…
I can crush PRs this year.

• 50K: 7 hours

• 50 miles: 11:43

• Distance: 100K → 100 miles

I have a pretty aggressive list of things I am manifesting for myself and husband and sons this year, and midway through February, I am already seeing a lot of them come to fruition.

There is no goal to big or small for you to shoot for from a new job or relationship to a certification or weight-loss or new house!

Keep going – Be Well – Press on

<3 K

Ran quickly over my lunch break. Had a certain path in mind.  I have a lot of paths – possibly hundreds –  worked out in my head of varied distances across the county where I live, based on all the thousands of miles I have run here.

Sometimes, you have to switch up your path for varied reasons – for example, today, an ornate curious looking gate that is normally closed, was open.  So of course I checked it out; I was not disappointed.  But then, a huge, scary looking dog was off leash – so, rather than take my chances, I turned and back tracked.  

All said, it was about 5k.  I recently wrote about testing my new awesome watch against my phone to see how far off they were after a weird race result.  Decided to test it one more time – cuz you know, data is data.  

Still a pretty close match.

Anywho – no matter what sort of run you are on today, literal or metaphorical – short or long – its good to have a plan in mind – and then – it imperative to be able to adapt and overcome when necessary.

Keep climbing.

Rock on. 

A 60,000-word manuscript somehow found its way into a less-than-100-page, whittled-down field guide.

It isn’t perfect.

I think—constantly—about what I could have, should have, or still might do to make it better. But this was never about perfection. In fact, maybe the opposite. ref Phil 3:12

Its also not about profit. The proceeds are being donated. Hell, I might never break even.

But what I find myself reflecting on instead is purpose. Somewhat because I am in a chapter of my life where I am constantly trying to improve, and that includes emotionally and spiritually – not just professional and physical.

I wrote this because I keep seeing the same patterns of struggle all around me —and I care.

You can comment on posts. You can write blogs. You can do podcasts. I do all of that. But I wanted to try to lay it all out in one place. What started as a napkin-planning moment (refence Origin story) turned into a year of talks, which eventually evolved into the book. In some ways, I started writing it years ago—pulling from reflections I had jotted down long before. The real sit-down-and-write phase began almost exactly one year before I hit “Publish.”

There were two or three stretches of non-stop writing—what I call heats. They’re a lot like running an ultra: long periods where you’re glued in place, laptop open, doing almost nothing else for days except putting one foot in front of the other. One word at a time. I no doubt looked as haggard and intense on the couch – coffee in hand, typing away – as I often do on a trail…sweaty and maybe even bloody…still hustling.

So what will the author copies I plan to give away at future events do?

They’ll spark conversations. They’ll build relationships. They’ll help fuel Community Gravity—while also generating donations for causes I care deeply about.

I’m grateful for the notes I’ve received so far. One, in particular, sticks with me: someone told me they were afraid to do a big thing for the first time. They did it anyway—wearing a daring bright red shirt—after reading CLIMB. And they crushed it.

That’s enough.

All that said, I have a 50K in less than 80 days. It’s finally above 40 degrees outside, and I have a few minutes before my next meeting—so I’m heading out for a quick run around the neighborhood. *apparently with my dog who saw me lacing my shoes…

Keep climbing. 

Purchase Here

https://a.co/d/8KjZvLn

I’ve always known that **chip time, race clock time, and whatever device you’re carrying** will never match *exactly*. That’s normal. Margin of error, signal drift, satellites fighting clouds, whatever.

But last weekend?

Last weekend was *next-level* nonsense.

I crossed the 10-mile finish line feeling amazing — strong, fast, confident. I’d been counting how many ten miles bib females passed me as they looped back to predict a podium spot….

Then I checked my phone… and apparently I had run **12 miles**, not 10. Meanwhile, the official race results insisted I ran a pretty slow 10 miler.

So here I am thinking:

**Have all my neighborhood PRs been lies?**

Have I been delusional this whole time, believing my pace is one thing when it’s actually something completely different?

There was only one way to settle this existential crisis.

I bought the **top-of-the-line Garmin** — the fancy sapphire solar titanium, 30-day battery, multi-band, multi-satellite, multi-sun, multi-moon, multi-galaxy GPS monster.

Okay, the moon part might be an exaggeration, but honestly at this point I wouldn’t be surprised.

Today I ran one of my usual neighborhood routes — a “5K-ish” loop I’ve been tracking for ages — with both the **Garmin and my phone** running simultaneously.

**Result?**

Nearly identical.

* Time: off by **less than a minute** (47 seconds to be exact) – and keep in mind that I couldn’t screenshot my phone and pause (or take a pic of because I didnt know how to pause it yet) my watch at the exact same moment – so factor some differential there as well.

* Distance: off by **less than a tenth of a mile** (422 feet exactly)

So what happened at the race?

I’m pretty sure I took a wrong turn — probably at the lollipop section where the 5-milers and 10-milers split. Instead of a clean 10 miler, I apparently created my own hybrid course and nearly ran a half marathon.

Which means:

* Yes, I was actually running close to a **9:00ish pace** the whole time.

* Yes, my phone wasn’t totally wrong.

* And YES — if the phone’s distance were to be believed, I was about to PR my half marathon** by about three minutes.

So was it worth dropping nearly $1,000 on this new Garmin?

**Absolutely.**

Not only did it solve the mystery, but now I have a watch that could probably guide me through Yosemite, call in a rescue helicopter, and maybe even open a wormhole.

This thing isn’t coming off my wrist anytime soon.

Race chip time: 1:54:27 – 10 mile race (that’s over an 11 & change min mile)

My phone said: 1:54:19 – distance 11.78 (that’s a 9’40 min mile)

1.78 is a big deal when you’re factoring pace.

Reasonable Conclusion – I took a bit of a wrong turn somewhere – and I think I know where (there was a 5 and a 10 going on at same time). Its well marked, my my phone and the signs matched up – until they didn’t…It was also well instructed and manned – I’m just an adhd goofball and this is NOT the first time I have done this (did it on a Northface 50k AND an UROC 50k)

And no matter what the official record says – I was running happy

<insert happiness proof>

On Inflexibility, Innovation, and the Comfort of the Familiar

Recently, I found myself noticing a pattern across three completely unrelated companies. Before anyone starts trying to guess who they are — don’t. I’ve never worked for any of them, and this isn’t about calling anyone out. For simplicity, let’s just call them Company A, Company B, and Company C.

What struck me based on recent observations from different levels of interaction – is that all three share something in common.

Each of them was founded or built around something clever, unique, or genuinely innovative. They created a formula, a method, a technology — and it worked. So much possibility…

The smart people I know at each place could point to it and say, “See? Here’s the model. Here’s the framework. This is how it works.” Then they draw hard impenetrable lines around it.

And that’s where the trouble begins. Especially where people are involved….

Because once they drew those hard lines around the idea, those lines became walls. The same rigidity that protected the original idea eventually started suffocating its evolution. Their brilliance got boxed in by their own rules.

I’ve watched all three companies — independently — now struggle with eerily similar problems. Not because they lack smart people. Not because their technology stopped being relevant. But because they never put anyone in the room who thinks differently from the people who drew the original lines.

The innovators protected the idea.

But no one protected it from stagnation.

A Thought Detour (But Stay With Me)

This might be the part where I lose some of you, but bear with me.

There’s a trending misattributed quote that floats around, falsely credited to Dostoevsky:

“Tolerance will reach such a level that the intelligent will be silenced for the comfort of fools.”

There’s no record of him ever writing that — not in Demons, The Brothers Karamazov, Crime and Punishment, or anywhere else. But the reason the misquote circulates is because, whether intentionally or not, Dostoevsky did explore themes that echo it: mass psychology, conformity, and what happens when people outsource their thinking to the masses.

So yes — even though the quote is fake, the spirit of the idea isn’t.

And that loops us right back to the problem of inflexibility.

When people — whether in society or inside a company — learn that they can stay safely within the lines and simply think what they’re supposed to think, anyone who colors outside those lines becomes “dangerous.”

Different becomes threatening.

Questioning becomes disruptive.

And innovation becomes impossible.

We do it to ourselves.

We create the disadvantage.

Heading Into the Holidays (and Everything They Bring)

As I walk into the holidays, preparing myself mentally for the usual seasonal drama — the comments, the opinions, the unspoken expectations — I’m trying to do something different this year.

I want to stretch different parts of my character.

Not just physically or professionally, but mentally and spiritually.

Not because it’s easy.

But because I want to set an example for my kids.

To show them what it looks like when someone refuses to stay trapped inside someone else’s lines.

To show them what real flexibility looks like.

To show them how to think — not what to think.

Because if we don’t model that, who will?

When 5 am comes and the progesterone hasn’t worn off yet and I want to sleep, I get up and work out. I am a little stiff from a race. Work out anyway.

When someone runs their mouth and their wrong or hurtful. Smile – especially if they were rude. Maybe say something thoughtful or helpful – but thats it.

And for all the rest of it – health, job, finances and future – you guest it – I keep pressing on. Its tattooed on me for a reason.

And yes, there’s a book coming – and its well on its way – and I hope it is helpful to just one life.

Just a month ago, I ran for the first time in over two years—just one mile. Encouraged by my pace, I pushed to two the next day, then back-to-back 5Ks the following week, improving my personal record each time. Yesterday I ran four miles, and today, five—maintaining an average pace under nine minutes per mile on hills and trails.

This resurgence comes at an interesting time. I’m already registered for a 50K in March, just over 100 days away, and as of today, I’ve added a 100K in the mountains of West Virginia.

My plan is to keep up with the 20-30 mins mostly lifting 3-5X/wk ( a variatiion of: swings, push-presses, squats, rows, loads of abs etc) and running 1-2 times, maintaining pace (need to actually slow down) and increasing slowly, maybe to up to 10 miles before race day for the 50k then again before the 100….

But this physical comeback is part of a much larger, more complicated story.

I recently realized that many of my chronic health challenges—irregular periods, ovarian cysts, cervical precancerous cells (requiring insanely painful procedures), miscarriages, ectopic pregnancies, insulin resistance, infertility, thyroid issues, gestational diabetes, endometriosis, and extreme weight fluctuations – and the list goes on —are all likely at least related to Polycystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS) – which my new brilliant doctor (finally) confirms I have.

I’m not even including the part about waking from a coma and learning to walk again and the related brain injury and lifetime of trigeminal neuralgia etc — I am just talking about the ‘being a woman’ stuff!!!!

For years, I thought, “this is just me.” Only recently did I learn that many of these symptoms are influenced by naturally produced GLP-1 agonists—hormones that, when the body stops making them, can often be replaced only through expensive prescriptions.

There was a decade when I trained intensely—running 5Ks five times a week, lifting regularly, completing marathons and ultras (50 in a decade) —and it kept me healthy. But as my career grew and life got heavier, fitness slipped to the background.

Two years and seven months ago, I reached my highest adult weight. With a GLP-1 medication, strict intermittent fasting, and exercise, I lost 48 pounds in ten months. Then I gained 20 back—despite staying on the highest dose—during one of the most toxic and stressful professional experiences of my life. My shoulder injury and surgery didn’t help.

That season taught me an important truth: for me, diet and exercise alone didn’t work; diet and exercise with the peptide did—but the peptide alone did not. I’ve tried nearly every plan, cleanse, and supplement, and I regret how often I chased results at the expense of my long-term health.

Five months ago, I decided to rebuild differently—sustainably. Now, I’m at my lowest weight in a decade, but more importantly, I feel strong, energetic, and pain-free. I’m sleeping well, eating normally, and protecting my body from old injuries (sciatica, foot, hip, knees, and shoulder).

At the same time, I’ve been exploring perimenopause, and it still amazes me how often women are told that debilitating symptoms—mood swings, temperature shifts, hair thinning, weight changes—are simply “normal” and must be endured. Often, after decades of other painful challenges, we’re expected to just keep coping quietly.

So, if hormone replacement therapy can help other people feel aligned with their truest selves, why shouldn’t I pursue what restores mine? My labs confirm perimenopause, and my doctor plans to prescribe progesterone once I finish a few screenings. But for now I am doing what I can naturally with supplements and a rigorous but safe, consistent and rewarding workout routine with smart nutrition.

Our experiences aren’t a competition; suffering isn’t a hierarchy. Every person doing their best with the body and circumstances they were given deserves acknowledgment and care.

For me, that means continuing to grow—physically, mentally, and spiritually—as long as I’m able, and modeling resilience and self-compassion for my sons and, hopefully, their future families.

Be well.
Rock on.

Halfway through reading Wolf at the Table, there is a scene where someone is asking another person to just tell them why they did something.  They just “want the truth”.

Similarly, I recently requested to schedule time with someone and I want them to tell me why something is happening in our relationship. 

I tell myself that I want to understand if there is something I did to cause a behavior or dynamic, so I could possibly do it differently to produce a better outcome.  I could then base my decision to continue the relationship or not on the answer.

But as I hear the character in the book asking this question, I want to tell her to not ask.  I want to advise her and rewrite this chapter.  Because it doesn’t matter what the other person says. It never does.  Not in real life or the book.

Some broken or strengthened part of each of us, as a result of every moment up to that action, causes us to do things we cant even explain to ourselves.

What is actually funny is that the person I have requested to speak to actually wrote a book about his own life and in it he describes a moment when someone was asking him the very same thing – WHY?

Why are we where we are? How did this happen to us?

I don’t think I want to know why anymore.  If the meeting happens, it will go very differently than I intended initially.

And I want to tell the fictional woman in the book to just get up from the table before he can answer and say, “You know what, it doesn’t matter why – its done”

Thinking over all the things that I have done in life and the effect it had on others, and the impact my words and actions may have had on various folks, I can’t really tell you why I did each of those things – I could only guess.  So what is the point?

If someone handed you a guide or formula on all the outcomes of each choice you have to make – what would we do next? Would we just be paralyzed in a pondering state?  Would we have to plan out all the results on a scale and decide who and what we care about most?

I’m too old for this.  My life is definitely half-over and it seems to have gone very quickly.

I definitely did not appreciate a million things I had overtime that are gone now and I can’t have them back.  And that is ok too.

No one deserves to be an ingredient in an exercise for someone else to work through their own demons, unless you need it too. And I don’t think I do.

In other words – you have a choice to make and so do I, as to what your character will do next in your own story. You’re the author and you’re holding the pen.

No, I mean it.

Merry Christmas, 2023.  Sipping my cold coffee – turkey is on the smoker, most things are already fixed and just need to be heated.  Thinking.

I’m not the best communicator, but I try.  Or so I have surmised over the years, it appears that not everyone ‘Speaks Kirsten’.

There is no part of me that has the energy or interest to participate in any sort of conflict anymore.  Not that I necessarily did previously, but I certainly wanted to ‘win’ and in some cases that would mean an argument.

That doesn’t mean that I don’t want to be able to convince people of things, if it’s a thing that I think is important (in either work or personal life).  I want the audience to believe, understand, and [for the sake of resolution of things that are important] agree with me. 

This is the current state of my being as a culmination of a whole lifetime, of course, but really, the last couple years was so tumultuous, that I have achieved conflict avoidance to a whole new level.

I know what it feels like to be listened to; admired; respected and needed.  I also know exactly what it feels like to have people not only disagree, but vehemently oppose every noise that comes out of my face – even when we both know its right  – just to either, a) support a narrative that I am less important than them or b) find a way to reappropriate whatever I came up with as their own. I’ve experienced toxicity of a whole other level. Its gross and I won’t do that again – ever. I’d rather wait tables at a diner in Europe.

You’ll have to just take my word for it.

So I had a choice to either float along in a place [after making significant changes] where I was likely secure until retirement, because I was valued [by a few of the right people] but also had been placed inside of a safe little spot where I wouldn’t cause anymore [necessary but disruptive] resistance or discomfort – or – take on a whole new challenge of greater responsibility.  And this new challenge would be very similar to something I had done before, so, I could likely use that experience to do it even better than last time.

I thought – I just did the biggest, coolest thing I will ever do – then I got to do another equally challenging and pretty significant thing and now BOOM – I get to do ONE MORE! Something I wasn’t even looking for.

One of the people I admire the most in business said, “You’re at the TOP of your game. You’re going to crush this!”

This may not be as easy a choice as it seems – for me – although I really did make it impulsively without pause.

I don’t regret that, though part of me still has fleeting moments of at least considering what I walked away from.

That said, Here I now am.  I’ll take it moment by moment, and chapter by chapter.

I know you are supposed to go into a new thing with open eyes and ears – observing and learning, while you plan. And I absolutely am.  Its best to avoid my tendency to do things very quickly before I really get a lay of the land.  This will be a daily challenge and I actually sense the expectation is that I will make rapid and significant changes.  So, yeah.

I’ve been doing blog/journal-posts for many years. But since I started, for the millionth time, to write my book, and got further than I’d ever gotten before, I have been taking these little blog moments and finding a way to work them into said book.  This post however, is just going to live right here on my site that 5 or 6 people visit.

2024, you’re almost here.

I will take a deep breath.  Resist taking anything personally.  Take a moment to start and end each day on a note of thanks.  And, learn to diffuse conflict while examining my purpose and finding a way to get the right messages heard and accepted.

We can’t take away anything that has already happened, but we can certainly decide if we’ll put those moments behind us as a historic artifact, or in front of us as a stepping stone.

Be well,

KSR

** AI was not used in this or any post I have ever written – but – I do find it is a useful tool for me to have conversations with to learn how to have my thoughts read back to me to practice being a better communicator 😀

In the ever-evolving landscape of life, I look ahead to 2024 and it has already presented me with exciting opportunities and significant changes. I’m delighted to share my experience, as it’s a year filled with engagements, new roles, and, most importantly, a sense of personal fulfillment.

Speaking Engagements

I find myself on the cusp of potentially speaking at three prominent conferences so far. These events are not only prestigious but also provide a platform to connect with like-minded individuals in our vibrant community, share knowledge, and grow both personally and professionally.

Career Track at BSidesCharm

Additionally, I’m thrilled to be taking on the role of overseeing the Career Track at BSidesCharm. This is a new challenge and an opportunity to do things a bit differently this time around. We have some surprises up our sleeves, which promise to make the event even more fulfilling. Helping with initiatives like this has always been a passion of mine, and I’m excited to take this on.

Moving On and Taking On

One of the most significant recent changes is my retirement from the Car Hacking Village after dedicating nine years to the cause from establishment and first sponsor and original logo, to themes, parties, swag, volunteers and more. I established relationships during that decade that I now consider family and I treasure them forever. However, change often brings new opportunities, so I’ve taken on a new role as a board member at ICS Village, which promises to be a fresh and exciting ride.

A Shift in Career Focus

In recent times, I’ve transitioned from my role as the NSP recruiting director to a new position as the Talent Engagement Lead at AFS. This change has led to many people asking me whether I miss running recruiting. The truth is, I don’t. It’s not easy to witness some things from afar, and to miss people – however, I’ve come to realize that I’ve always been a multi-faceted professional and that letting go is strengthening and change is necessary. While I was directing a department, managing a team, and handling complex recruiting tasks, I was simultaneously engaged in various other activities, such as organizing events, mentoring, and speaking engagements. Now I get to just do the later, and do it with more focus.

Reflecting on My Career

This shift in my career has given me a moment to reflect. I’ve consistently juggled multiple responsibilities throughout my professional journey. Whether it was running events, planning & designing social content, volunteering, serving on boards, or presenting at conferences – I was always actively dedicated in this area. However, was previously doing so while simultaneously balancing managing recruitment, crafting and improving processes, strategizing campaigns, and continually providing detailed statistical reports to executive leadership. And the realization that I have the opportunity to ‘just’ focus on the things I’m passionate about is a remarkable revelation. *Turns out its a fulltime job* 🙂

A Fulfilling Change

So, do I want to go back to [running recruiting] someday? Perhaps. There may be a day when I feel the itch to start from scratch at a small organization or revamp a larger one ((I really do like identifying broken things and fixing them)). I’ve had experience successfully doing both, and I know how to handle it. But for now, I find immense satisfaction and enjoyment in what I do. It’s far less stressful, allowing me to invest more of myself into my endeavors, and truly take better care of myself personally too.

Grateful for the Journey

I consider myself incredibly fortunate to be in this position. As I take on new challenges and explore exciting opportunities in 2024, I can’t help but be grateful for the journey that has brought me here – and all the people who helped along the way (even the ones who made it harder)! It’s a reminder that embracing change, even when it means letting go of certain things, can open the door to personal growth and contentment.

A Message for You

Lastly, I’d like to leave you with a thought. If you’re wondering whether you’re in the right place in your career, remember that change is not only natural but often essential for personal and professional growth. Seek opportunities where you can make an impact, be valued, and lead a life with less stress. I hope my journey going into 2024 inspires you to embrace change and find your own path to fulfillment.

I challenge you to do something new and scary. Its worth it.

If you take out a couple DNFs, and include one virtual marathon (offered due to covid), today was my 50th race in just under 14 years.  Its funny that we had the storm to contend with because coincidentally, it was 7 years ago today that I ran the Northface 50 miler during a white out blizzard (yes, in Sept) 

Here’s a pic:

https://www.facebook.com/TNFECS/photos/a.205473456155435/1148236898545748/

Anywho – Today was my first real race in 4 years, minus a virtual marathon in 2021.  *Though my son and I did a 50k ruck on the W&OD one random weekend.

I recently lost my old recordings log of all my races and have been manually looking up registrations and results.  Not done but found most of it.

Tracking:

1 – 100k

3 – 50 milers

10 – 50ks (need to triple check, seems low)

9 Full marathons

15 half marathons

A handful of smaller races (1 Olympic tri, a few 10 milers, a 40-mile bike race etc)

That’s not everything but its over 1,000 racing miles. 

Not positive how to estimate the training miles most accurately, but I’m sure I could figure it out. Back in my PR days (2012-2015) I did 5k every weekday and not less than 10 once per weekend.

Even though I’ve lost over 30 pounds in the last 5 months, I really didn’t ‘foot-time-train’ as hard as I used to in the past – and am NOT where I want to be *yet*

Let’s face it, I’m also older and my body has been through a LOT.  I have a tricky knee and tricky ankle and sciatica now.  I also have a different work life and energy level.  I used to push through *everything*, and now I just don’t.  And that’s ok.

Since the beginning of April I have drank on avg, a gallon of water most days, worked out 1-2 hours daily (resistance/lifting and a lot of walking/elliptical), tracked macros and calories (lean & clean w lots of protein); reduced/cut: dairy, sugar, coffee and alcohol.  Still gluten free and no red meat.

OK – Back to the race!!

All said, I was a long way away from those PR days and was just in survival mode the whole time – but no stress – just me and what was left of Ophelia, the Tropical storm, out on the old OSS trail adjacent to Quantico.  For safety reasons, the race was moved from Sat to Sun and the trail conditions and weather were surprisingly not bad at all.  I actually enjoyed what rain made it through the trees and only lost my footing a few times.

Unlike the traditional one 10k loop as many times as you can in 12 – it was, 3 loops: long (11.1) med (6.5) and short (3.4) and you do whatever you want. I love this format and hope they keep it.

Sparing the details, I started getting sick around 2am and was sick until the race started at 6.  Whenever I went from walk to run, I wasn’t sure my stomach could handle it.

I love this race series and love this trail. Best director, best crew, best aid-station, best format – hands down. My absolute favorite. Its my happy place and it was just me running against myself,  hoping to not fall in the mud and break a bone or cut myself open requiring stitches; or get bit or stung or trampled by a deer to crack a few ribs [[ALL of which has happened in the past]].

Actually guess what, 5 mins into it, a deer bolted right in front of me.  What are the chances?  It missed me but I wish I had a go-pro on, it was crazy. That may not sound scary but a 150+ pound animal running 30+ miles an hour can be pretty scary, especially when its pitch dark – and yes, it does hurt if you get hit, so that fucked with my head a little (I screamed like a baby).

I ended up calling it a day at the half marathon mark, even though Steve said he’d do a loop with me and I do wish I had done that.  I am only going to be slightly obsessed though, because I’m not hurt and now I’m resting.  I do plan to stay in hard-core training-mode and get in far more race-shape for the next AE run in April, since I promised the RD I’d be back for it and I keep my word!!

A half marathon on a trail is nothing to be ashamed of. Not what I dreamed of but there will be more races! I’m not using trail conditions or weather as an excuse, because like I said, none of that bothered me.

All said, Salt bath done – And I ate (gluten free) pizza.

Know your why.  Pick your battles.  Find your thing and Do It!