This week started with me losing three precious rings. Valuable and irreplaceable. Poof gone. And that sucks emotionally and financially. And I filed with my homeowners/renters (Im both right now – long story) – and its under investigation (another long story). I don’t feel like getting into the details, but that is a good summary and Im trying (to find and/or replace them). – now I just WAIT AND SEE.
Meanwhile, my youngest, Justin had some challenges happen to him in school and again without going into all the details, that would take forever, we’re doing all that we can and WAITING AND SEEING with him too.
Next his brother had something occur that will be very costly, and again, sans details, trust me when I say – Ive already fully exhausted all the ideas and we’re doing what we’re doing and it is what it is.
*Insert all the bible references here for surrendering and trusting and learning from tribulation.*
So I think to myself – Im just gonna close up this winner of a week with a quick run. Even though Im not exactly where I want to be training-wise etc, I have been improving and Im still going to do this big race in a few weeks so off I go with my dog, who I have been doing very fast hill repeats with lately.
We get going, we’re really rolling, its feels great but a little bit scary and then it happens. I fall.
*Anyone who has followed my ultra-running story knows, Ive had a few very bad falls [I broke my hand a few yrs ago and later left half my knee on a mountain]. And there is a backstory associated with how and why I fall –> but in following my writing style this evening of skipping details (possibly because tonights fall caused some pretty awesome injuries to both hands and typing hurts) – I will say, I was just thinking the other day how proud I was of myself for running fast down hill on the repeats lately, w out fear…
So now, I have badly skinned up knees and hands (a nurse should really clean the rocks out better and my first aid kit is at my other house) and I have some super yucky injuries on my right hand that might/should prevent me from running the big race in a few wks. I realize people who don’t run, endurance ultras particularly, wonder why you need a hand to run but trust me – you do.
All that being said – I am seriously seeing Gods hand in all of this.
In the losing the rings, I feel that inexplicable peaceful ‘its ok’ feeling and I can see some things in my character that I needed to work on that losing the rings might accomplish.
Im not going to get into the two kid things, because they involve other people – and – Im tired – so Ill say this. Ive been taking the wrong approach with some challenges recently and I can look back at my life and see a pattern in my behavior that Im in a position now to change and improve.
So these injuries now – maybe its Him stopping me from going to a race Im not ready for. Maybe its so I’ll go do something else Im supposed to do that day. All I can do now, is – WAIT AND SEE [how bad my injuries are tomorrow, how fast I heal etc].
Im thankful for so many things. Everything I have ever faced turned out fine in the end. There have seriously been some dark and scary times. And now Im just going to be my best me and do things as well as I can.
Im currently taking my career to a whole new level and facing challenges and the possibilities are
endless but its not going to be easy.
Next week Im goinig to TAKE OFF A FEW DAYS (yes, me) and take one of my sons somewhere he has never been and do cool shit. All the work will be here when we get back. This summer Im going to go somewhere Ive never been with the whole family – and do amazing things.
See your challenges and struggles differently – especially the unfair, the inconvenient and the painful.
Be your best you.
Be well,
Love ~K~
*~* I love my family, dog, friends, job, blessings, homes, people, life *~*
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